You Are Capable!

This time of year people start considering options for next year. Some parents are considering accessing classes in a school environment (public, private or co-op classrooms.) Whatever decisions you make, I encourage you to just make sure that you are the person in control, not a school or a school teacher. The control issue is very important. It means that you don't have to jump through hoops in order to get the class that you want. It means that if the class works, you use it. If it doesn't work, just stop using it and go to something else. Don't wait out the term! If you are accessing it for one class and it works, then great!. But don't feel like you "must" use their classes. Beware if you start feeling incapable. Sometimes situations like that can feed your fears, and make you feel more and MORE incapable. But we know different - you ARE capable. You're able to decide whether each class is the right thing for your child, and you will remain capable to making good decisions even if you sign up for a class at a school.

No matter what -- make sure you always feel confident in your abilities, and remain in control of the education of your child.

Blessings,

Lee

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Continuing Education for Homeschool Professionals!

In many states nurses, doctors, and other professionals are required to take a certain amount of continuing education courses each year. They need to stay up-to-date on the latest research and trends.

Homeschooling parents have a similar need for continuing education. Soon it will be homeschool convention time, and I encourage you to put them on your calendar now! If you don't have a convention in your state, go to a neighboring state. Conventions can show you the newest curriculum, and you can find the resources that will be perfect for your child. Conventions provide wonderful classes that will instruct you on how to teach, or encourage and inspire you to continue along this sometimes challenging path. You'll find educational games and activity suggestions that will spark interests in your children. Conventions aren't 100% perfect, and I know they can be very overwhelming at times. They can also help you plan ahead, learn more, and become motivated again.

Take a moment to put your homeschool conventions on the calendar! Here are the 2008 conventions in Washington State. When you are there, make sure you stop by my booth and say "Hi!". You can also hear me speak on the topics shown below:

Christian Heritage Conference
April 17-19
Redmond, WA
more...

NW Catholic Conference
May 2-3
Tukwila, WA
Topic: "College Preparation"
more...

WHO Convention
June 13-14
Puyallup, WA
Topics: "Gifted Education" and "Transcripts"
more...

WATCH Conference
August 8-9
Seattle, WA
more...

Blessings,

Lee
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"Stand By Your Man" - Homeschool Addition

In our Sunday School class on "Love and Respect" I learned a new strategy for dealing with teenage boys! Women tend to relate best face-to-face while talking. The book suggests that men relate best shoulder-to-shoulder without necessarily using words. If you are struggling with your teenage son, try to spend some quiet time doing nothing, saying nothing, and accomplishing nothing. Just be by his side, whether in the car or doing another activity he is interested in. Chances are, he will interpret that outing in a positive way.

In my own life, I have seen how that strategy can work. When I have a difficult subject to discuss with my boys, it goes over best if we are NOT talking face to face. It helps if we are on a walk, or in the car, and are both looking forward rather than at each other. It's almost as if these guys feel threatened when we look them in the eye. Like a pack of wolves, they can perceive eye contact as a threat and fight back.

If you are struggling with your boys and desperate for ideas, it may be worth a try. Shoulder-to-shoulder, avoid eye contact. Let me know if it works!

Blessings,

Lee


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Only "Actual Teachers" Should Read This!

A virtual school had an advertisement with a parent testimonial stating:

"We have found the K12 curriculum to be far above anything we could have done on our own, plus we have the added advantage of an actual teacher for help"

Don't be fooled! Homeschooling parents ARE actual teachers - the best possible teachers for their children.

That same virtual school had another advertisement that said:

"Student/student interaction is also actively encouraged, so (this virtual school's) students are always well-educated and well-socialized."

In my opinion, any group that worries about children being "well-socialized" are NOT homeschooling groups. It's one of those "ah ha" statements that really indicates a lot about a group. Any time someone tells you that you need a classroom experience to be "well-socialized" you can confidently stand your ground. Be polite, but firm, and explain that your homeschooled children ARE well-socialized, and they didn't need a classroom environment to get that way. Friends and family, people of all ages, and the normal comings and goings of your life provide all you need to "socialize" your children.

Remember: you ARE an "actual teacher!"

Remember: you are providing your children with all the social skills they need to shine in this world.

Blessings,

Lee

The HomeScholar provides a free monthly e-newsletter, daily blog support, low cost videos and private consultations -- everything you need to successfully homeschool through high school.

Rethinking Failure

Recently I've shared with some of my homeschool "failures" like literature analysis and nature studies. I didn't even mention art and Washington State history! Everyone feels like they have failed at some points. I think it may be an issue with motherhood in general: a chronic feeling of guilt.

Now that my kids have graduated from homeschool, I can see that these "failures" weren't really failures at all. Many times it was me adjusting my homeschool to meet the learning style of my children. I perceived them as failures because I wasn't able to get them to love learning by meeting MY learning style. Love of learning came when I met THEIR learning style. Now with my 20/20 hindsight, I can say that I didn't "fail" at literature analysis, nature studies, art, or state history. Instead, I adjusted the way I taught to match my children's way of learning - and that is a success.

Someday when you are looking back on your homeschool, you may find that some of your "failures" were actually successes as well! Just something to think about the next time you're feeling guilty....

Blessings,

Lee

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Respecting your Young Men

A while ago, a portion of one of my newsletters was plagiarized. I consulted my in-house "lawyer in training" - my son Alex. Every time I think of our interaction that day, it really warms my heart. On Sunday, during our "Love and Respect" Sunday School class, I think I finally realized why Alex's help was so important to me that day. He was protecting me - which was demonstrating that he loved me. In the book, it talks a lot about cycles, and how love LEADS TO respect, and respect LEADS TO love. So I started thinking about what I did to show my son respect that day. I think that the moment when I asked his opinion of the situation, adult to adult, was the moment that he knew I respected him.

We won't even think about all the times I completely *fail* at the love and respect cycle, but I did think it was interesting to see on situation in which it worked. I hope it will encourage you.



Blessings,

Lee

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Time to Panic?

I don't want you to feel like you "should" panic, but I want you to know that this is the time of year when most of my phone calls are panic - related. Parents are starting to think about grades and about what they will teach next year, and sometimes it get so overwhelming that they panic.

Panic is a normal, natural part of being a homeschool parent! Panic is good feedback - it says that you care enough to do a really good job. Panic can help you remember to evaluate your homeschool, and make changes if needed.

I had moments of panic. I sometimes cried at night. I sometimes worried about the most insignificant details! You're not alone, and one day you'll be done homeschooling and will finally realize how successful you were.

Relax. Evaluate your homeschool. Remind yourself that you are a "love-giver" and not just a "care-giver" and that can make all the difference!

Blessings,

Lee

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Raising Men vs. Raising Boys

There is a watershed moment in high school when it comes to parenting boys. When they are younger, your focus is raising an obedient and confident child. Once they get into high school, you have to somehow transition into developing respect for your son as growing man.

Check out the book "Love and Respect." Instead of reading it as a "husband and wife" book, think about how it pertains to young men. How can you show real RESPECT for your son, when he drives you crazy? Try to find something he is good at, something in his area of specialization, and show him adult-to-adult respect for that skill (as often as you can!)



I also found it helpful when my husband and sons would talk man to man. When they were disrespectful, my husband would say "Don't treat my WIFE that way" in order to put them on a level playing field. Saying "Don't treat YOUR MOTHER that way" is reminding them that they are not men. Instead, even in conflict, try to treat them as men.

Believe it or not, raising men is even more challenging than raising boys. It is made easier of you recognize the transition and as parents discuss how to begin to deal with it.

Blessings,
Lee

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What to do with a Hands-on Learner

At the high school level hands-on learning often means using real-life experience: science experiments, geography experiments, etc. We used YMCA Youth & Government for our American Government credit. Speech & Debate, or Toastmasters can be a good English or elective credit. By the time a student is in high school, it may be a good time to encourage the student to help you choose curriculum. That doesn't mean it's a free-for-all with your money, though. What I mean is "choose between these math options" or "choose a science from this website." Look at highschoolscience.com, or hometrainingtools.com to choose science.

If you want to read about other moms who have gone the "hands on" route and survived:

Barb Shelton High School Form+U+LA



Micki and David Colfax Homeschooling for Excellence



And there is the great stand-by for learning styles - Cynthia Tobias The Way They Learn:



Blessings,

Lee
www.TheHomeScholar.com
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Making School Fun!

I tried to incorporate games into our homeschool whenever possible. My kids didn't enjoy many of the hands-on projects that we did, but they do love playing games. After a while I gave up trying to find unit study projects that they enjoyed, and I focused more on what they loved - games. We played math games, art games, economics games. They would giggle when I wrote on the assignment sheet "Play 30 minutes of Masterpiece" or "Play SAT Game." Making homeschooling fun is a great way to instill the love of learning.

Blessings,

Lee

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The Best Advice in Every Situation

The best advice in the world never changes: Know your child and trust yourself. You will figure out what's best, you can make these decisions. Nobody knows your child like you do. Nobody loves your child like you do. Nobody wants the best for your child the way that you do. You were made for this purpose. You are the perfect person for this job and for this decision you are facing now.

Blessings,

Lee
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Courting the Colleges

When planning college applications with your student, you will often have specific questions that you would like to get answered. Sometimes there are easy "yes/no" type questions that will be consistent from college to college. More often than not, however, the answer may vary depending on the college. Take for example the question on whether a college will still consider your student a freshman if they have an AA degree and more than 90 credits. Some colleges take a hard line at the 90 credits. Others will show some flexibility. The best approach to these types of questions is to call the admissions office directly and ask. This approach does a number of things, all of which are good. Most apparent, it will get you the answers you need to tailor your plans for the specific colleges you are interested in. What is less apparent, however, is that by asking the question, you are showing the college that you are seriously interested in them.

I have have often said, the college application process is like a courting dance. In order to get them interested in you, you sometimes have to show you are interested in them! Asking clarifying questions is a great way to demonstrate your interest. Believe me, colleges pay attention to the families that are asking application and admissions questions!

So go ahead and call. Better yet, get your student to call. Later, they might just recognize your name when they see your application!

Blessings,
Lee
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Letter of Recommendation Tips

Some people who write letters of recommendation for our children may not be aware of the standard format of a recommendation. The college will want to know about the person giving the recommendation - their name, title, contact information, etc. Here are some links that may help you to see some samples:
http://www.boxfreeconcepts.com/reco/
http://www.mcps.k12.mt.us/hellgate/senior_projects/senior_proj_forms/letter_rec.rtf

In general you're looking at something liked this:

Recommender's name
Recommender's address
Today's date

Dear College Name (OR To Whom it May Concern)

Paragraph One is identifying the student, and how the recommender has come to know the student.

Paragraph two is specific evidence of character traits that the recommender knew from contact with the student. Include knowledge, maturity, or any project or job completed.

Paragraph three is about work skills in general that the student has displayed.

Paragraph four is where it actually states "I highly recommend....."

Sincerely,
Recommender's Signature
Recommender's Typed full name
Recommender's Title or position

If possible, it would be optimal to get the letter into that format. Look on each college website, because sometimes they have specific requirements for recommendations, like "in a sealed signed envelope" or "mail separately" or something. The recommender will have to physically sign the letter.

I hope that helps!
Blessings,
Lee

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Misty, water-colored memorization...

...of the way we were....

Did you ever have to memorize anything in high school? Don't remember? I did, and to this day I can still annoy my family with "No Man is an Island"! Memorization isn't a the most critical skill, but it can be fun. Choose a poem or a scripture, and try it for yourself.

When we began, I didn't actual think that memorization was that important, so I set my sights pretty low. I began with deciding that my kids would merely read the same passage each day of the week for three weeks. I wasn't trying for the goal of memorization at all, I was just trying to give them an "ear" for good literature. What I found out really surprised me! About two weeks into this process, I found that the boys had memorized much of the passage. By three weeks they could say it completely by heart! Later in our homeschool career, they were able to memorize large portions of scripture just by reading it aloud daily to me. I was amazed - I didn't know the human brain worked like that!

Try it, and see if it's fun for your own homeschool!

Blessings,
Lee
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Girding Your Loins for High School!

Use 7th and 8th grade as your "high school training time." Not so your kids can working at high school, it so you can work on how you THINK about high school. When my kids were that age, I would think about how many hours we spent on activities, I would think about the different class titles that I could use for different experiences. 7th and 8th grade is also a perfect time to be planning ahead for the job in front of you. Buy a book about homeschooling high school, take classes at the convention, and get my video if it would be helpful. That way when you get to high school you won't be afraid. It's all about avoiding fear, and planning ahead is the best way to do that. Don't wait to become fearful and THEN plan or seek help, because that's where the tears start!

My favorite book for this age range is:
Homeschoolers' College Admissions Handbook: Preparing Your 12- to 18-Year-Old for a Smooth Transition It was broad enough, and not too deep, so that it was a good introduction. Some of the other books out there are so in-depth and intense that it can be very overwhelming.

So there you go, that's about 5 minutes of my first video right there, for free! LOL! Take care, and give me a call or an email if you need help.

Blessings,
Lee
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The HomeScholar
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Homeschooling While Building a House

I've had friends who homeschooled while building a house. If you find yourself in that situation, remember that any construction experiences your high schoolers have can count as high school credit. Woodworking, carpentry, occupational credit, etc., might be good course titles to consider. Your kids are learning while you do these things, right? Let them live and learn.

Have you read Barb Shelton's Homeschool Form + U + La? That was what her life was like. She talks about how she incorporated home construction into her transcript. Here is her website:
http://www.homeschooloasis.com/

Also, the book Homeschooling For Excellence by the Colfax's might encourage you. Their family was also building a home all through high school, and both kids went on to Ivy League schools.
http://www.amazon.com/Homeschooling-Excellence-David-Colfax/dp/0446389862

Blessings,
Lee
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Are You Qualified to Teach High School English?

You are totally, completely, and 100% qualified! Not because you know English perfectly, or even because you know how to grade perfectly, but because you are their parent. The one who knows them and loves them best.

Teaching English in high school is not about grading criteria or percentages. It's about getting lots of writing practice - and having your students write a lot. It's also about editing their papers. Just read them, circle things that are obvious spelling or grammar errors (OBVIOUS errors, that's all.) It is also about discussing their ideas: "What did you mean when you said....." Or "please rewrite this it doesn't make sense." But you're not doing anything magical, you're just reading it over. It's just like if a friend said "would you please read this?" That's all!

Remember that some public school English teachers don't have an English degree. They may not even have the English background that you do! The only reason they use rubrics and other grading criteria is because they have to grade so MANY students, and be consistent between them. Not us! We want to encourage each student to do THEIR best, and that means we don't really want to treat all our students the same. We want each to excel in their own way.

Another advantage that homeschoolers have is the student-teacher ratio with English. In public school, kids are lucky if they get one paper a semester to be assigned and carefully edited. With 20-30 kids in the class, teachers aren't necessarily expected to read everything. I bet you'll read and give more feedback on your kids papers than they would ever get in public school! We can read their history or science papers for quality writing as well, because we evaluate them in all their subjects.

Husbands and wives can often share the burden of grading English papers. That happened to be a HUGE chunk of homeschooling where my husband helped.

I want you to know that even though I didn't "Grade English Papers" - my boys still got full tuition scholarships to college. They both still got into the Honors program. And they still get As and Bs on their college papers.

Blessings,

Lee
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Withdrawing from Public High School

Sometime a student will request to be withdrawn from public high school and begin homeschooling. If that is the case for you and you can support them, I would encourage you to do it and not look back. You CAN pull your students out anytime you want to. If you want to get their high school grades first you could wait until the grades are released and then pull them. If they aren't getting good grades, then you can pull them out BEFORE they get their grades, and then they won't ever be on their transcript. Just a little high school tip :-)

In Washington State, all you have to do is formally withdraw your student from school, and then get your declaration of intent into the school district. Use the declaration of intent on the Washington Homeschool Organization (WHO) website, so you don't give the district information that will have a negative impact on your student.

If you are in this situation, I would love to speak with you. Call or e-mail and we can set up an appointment (Lee@HomeScholar.com). If possible, I really recommend my beginning "Preparing to Homeschool High School" crash course.

If you can't do that, then we can just talk on the phone, or take it one hour at a time. I just find that doing the whole thing all at once is easier, to get you quickly up to speed. If finances are a issue, then you may want to get my Preparing to Homeschool High School DVD. It's not as personalized as a one-on-one consultation, but it will still really help. Some people watch the video, and then call me for a one-hour appointment afterwards, and that works out very well.

Blessings,
Lee
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The HomeScholar
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"Helping parents homeschool through high school"

HELP! Homeschooling High School Isn't Working!!

>>>>Included in one mom's desperate lament was the following: "I don't think homeschooling is working!"<<<<


With high school, remember that if it works you use it. If it doesn't work, then stop using it - try something else.

Another major theme: You don't have to teach. They just need to learn. You don't necessarily have to teach ANYTHING in high school. What good does teaching do? You only have to make sure they learn it.

I didn't know the answers to math or science either (and you would think I would, because I'm a nurse, but it's not true!) I completely lost it with math about a month into Algebra 2. Everyone loses it in high school math - everyone. But it's not our job to learn the stuff, you know. We just have to make sure the student learns the stuff.

My kids did chemistry and physics completely alone. They did Algebra 2, pre-calculus and calculus completely alone. I only gave them the tests, and had to look up the answers. By the time we got to calculus, I didn't even know what the symbols meant anymore. I only knew that the answer had to look like the answer in the book.

Look at what you wrote about writing ..."they are better writers than me - and I'm a professional." Can I just point out that homeschooling appears to be working? They ARE succeeding. Once you get into high school, writing is mostly about practice. Edit the papers for spelling and grammar, yes, but it's mostly just having them practice, practice, practice. It's working! Your homeschooling writing class is succeeding beyond measure! They are good writers!

I couldn't keep up with the books either. I have confessed before that I didn't do "literature analysis" with my kids. I just asked them if they liked the book (to which they usually said "yes" and not much more.) They have grown up and done fabulously with the honors literature courses in college, so I know they weren't damaged by my weaknesses. I couldn't keep up with my kids reading either, but you know what? They were reading thousands of books for fun, and I didn't stress out about reading those books ahead of them. So why did I stress out about reading their school books ahead of them? I don't know!

Consider public school for a moment. Would the teacher pre-read every book? No, just the one or two they used in a year. Would the teacher be able to help with writing more than you? No, likely it would be just grammar and spelling. And anyway, YOU are a professional writer, not a teacher at a school. What about science? I didn't help my kids at science at all, but Kevin and Alex both got straight-As in college science after homeschooling, so I know that it works.

My concern with the comments that "Homeschooling isn't working" is that people forget the alternative. Homeschooling may be hard (OK, it absolutely IS hard) but it is much more effective than a public or private school. It is the 1 to 1 tutoring, the mastery before moving on, the absolute love for the student that make homeschoolers succeed. None of those things are available at a public or private school.

There are lots of resources for homeschoolers. Online courses, tutors, co-ops, video programs, and curricula for every learning style. You may need help, but that doesn't mean that homeschooling isn't working OR that putting your child into school is THE one and only answer to problems.

Blessings,
Lee
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The HomeScholar
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How do I "do" Current Events?

>>>>How do I incorporate current events into our homeschool?<<<<

Hi Michele,

In 7th grade we were doing Apologia Biology, Sonlight 100, French, Algebra, SAT prep, and piano. For current events, I bought World Magazine, but that's because my kids are very *into* current events. I think the easiest and most fun way is just to get the newspaper daily. The last two years, I have used a yellow highlighter to circle any articles that they are "required" to read, and I found that they would read other things in the paper as well. You can also ask them questions that they have to answer: What time is low tide today? (Of course, that only works along the coast!) We also listen to a responsible news commentary show during lunchtime. That really helps them to get interested in the topics of the day, and we can discuss the callers opinions. I haven't had them do any written summary, because we do a lot of writing in our homeschool anyway. I usually make current events "required" twice a week. I have found that by using the newspaper, they seem to enjoy reading it on their own more often than I assign. I confess that I sometimes HIDE the newspaper when the stories are especially gross. Hope that helps.

Blessings,
Lee